The author of this wonderful blog is currently in a relationship. And he thought it might be funny to say to his girlfriend that he was flirting with someone else. It didn't go down too well. I had to say it was something else I was flirting with!
I’m lying on two points here, I’m not flirting with anyone, and my relationship with relegation is a lot more than suggestive teasing and risqué banter. Believe me, I WISH I was flirting with relegation. A mere 5 games left to play in my league season, my club lie in 9th place and remain favourites to be one of two teams relegated from Division 1, the second tier in my county. I have calculated that we will need at least 9 points and favourable results elsewhere to give us a chance. After 13 games, we only have 7 points. So that doesn’t bode well for us. Pressure is only for tires I always say. I wonder if I’d be saying that when I’m defending a last minute corner holding onto to a precious one goal lead.
Although I wonder, this scenario is not all new to me. I have been in this position before, knee deep in a relegation battle just two years ago. Everything was new to me back then, as it was the first time I played club soccer since I was 8 years old. I had walked away from underage due to my omission from an end of season competition. I never went back to that club. Anyways, my lack of consistent structured training in that time left me with a lot to learn when I joined my new club. And I had a lot to learn. My playing time would be extremely limited in that first season but I accepted that and a position on the sideline where I watched the magic or lack of unfold in front of me.
Losing games, sliding down the surface of the table, not being able to make a difference to a terrible situation, these things were all compounded for me that bit more than others on the team. I had a deep connection with this club I was now playing for. One of their founding members just happened to be my uncle. And I just happened to be named after him. Tragically he was killed in a car crash a few years before my arrival into this world. It was a huge blow to the family, not least of all my dear grandmother. I was told a lovely story of how my grandmother first held me as a child and how my mother told her she had named me after my uncle. My grandmother broke down in tears. It was if her own son was given back to her. I was extremely close to my grandmother and her passing some years ago was heartbreaking for me.
Sadly there was no happy ending to my poignant decision to play for my club. There was no triumphant playing of the Great Escape theme tune. A mid-season revival where we played to our potential made me dream of bigger things. A team-mate told me we wouldn’t be making any such dreams a reality. He was right. However, I never expected us to lose our last 7 league games in a row. Our fate was confirmed in the penultimate game. We were denied a go ahead goal in the first half via a dubious offside decision and never recovered after that. It was soul destroying. I never had been relegated in anything before in my life. The closest experience I had was on Pro Evolution Soccer 2010.
This was no game, it was reality. There was one small crumb of comfort. Our last game was against the team in 2nd. Our fierce rivals were in first place with no games left to play. All going well, we would have to win the final game and virtually hand the first division title to our rivals to ensure our survival. No such favours were necessary and we struggled our way to a 5-0 defeat. It was scant consolation to be honest. Champions crowned in front of us, rivals still promoted, my club relegated.
We intended to go straight back up the following year and that’s what we did. However, a lack of training at the turn of 2014 saw us stumble yet again midway through the season. A prevailing attitude that we could just show up and walk through this division was evident throughout. For the most part, when we turned up, we were good. However, too often we let games and poor opposition get the better of us. We finished 2nd last year, one point away. In truth, we should won the league by 6 or 7 points.
Unfortunately, it’s an attitude that has stayed with us to this season. Despite winning a pre-season tournament, we soon found ourselves rooted to the relegation spaces. But instead of throwing games away we’ve been on the receiving end of thrashings. It’s just as if the team surrenders when we go a goal down. Ironic considering that in the first league game of the year we came back from a man down and a goal down to gain a point. That desire and spirit has seldom been since. I’ve suffered too personally, suffering a reoccurrence of my knee injurie that has kept me out for over a month. At the time of writing, I am desperately trying to restore my fitness for the final few games.
Playing for this club gives me no end of pride. More often than not when I step onto our home field, I bless myself in honour of my family. It’s not attention seeking, it’s not a ritual, it’s a mark of respect. It just so happens our pitch is beside a graveyard, one where my family members of past now rest. So much of my family and my life is intrinsically linked with this club that ferments a loyalty. A loyalty to this club that I could never replicate with any other. And while my name may never be filling the column inches of broadsheets or tabloids of this country and beyond for my talent, I have an unrelenting desire to give everything I can to make this club a success. Right now, its starts on the field.
Being part of a relegation once was enough. I have no intention of going down again.
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